Should I Swim in the Pool or the Ocean?

During our annual conference held on the coast of Kenya last week, I managed to fit in some time for swimming. There were two choices for swimming, the wild and beautiful Indian Ocean or the calm man-made pool. Most of the time I chose to swim in the pool. The water was clean and cool and perfectly clear. I could see right to the bottom and would leisurely make my way from one end of the pool to the other. It wasn't a large pool and I felt safe playing within its borders.

On the other hand the ocean was the complete opposite of the pool. It was huge, seemingly going on forever. Large waves would break on the sand and wash up piles of seaweed. Swimming in the ocean was a guarantee to come out covered with seaweed and sand. On top of that there were little jellyfish in the water. The one time I ventured into the ocean with some friends, one of my friends got stung by a little bright blue jellyfish that landed on her arm. I narrowly missed another as I quickly made my way back to the safety of shore. After that I stuck to swimming in the pool.

But now I wonder if I missed out by avoiding the ocean. When I did swim in the ocean the warm salty water was fun to float in and I could ride the waves in to shore. And there was something amazing about being a part of something so big that sustains so much life. It reminds me of the way I live my life sometimes. I like things to be clean and clear with very defined borders. Like the safety of the pool I prefer the safety of my life the way it is right now. I know how things work and feel as if I have some measure of control.

However I feel God asking me to leave the safety of the pool and head out into the ocean. There is something big out there that He wants me to be a part of. The thing is, it's messy and dirty and even dangerous out there. I might get stung by a jellyfish or thrown to the bottom by a big wave. I might swallow a mouthful of seawater or scrape my knees on the sand. But when I'm out there, floating on the water, there is nothing more incredible than experiencing the beauty of the ocean that stretches out forever.

It might sound funny to hear a missionary talk about leaving the safety of the pool. Aren't I already out in the ocean living here in Africa serving God? It certainly felt that way when I first arrived in Tanzania. It was difficult enough to just dip my toes in the ocean at the time or maybe even wade out to my knees. But now God wants me to go in further and I'd rather retreat back to the pool. I'm ready to spend some time in the cool safety of the pool instead of facing the waves and the seaweed headed for me.

I don't think it matters where in the world we are or how we are serving God, most of us have felt like this at some point. The idea of facing overwhelming circumstances, painful events or stepping into the unknown where we can't see the bottom is more than we can handle. And yet somehow when we step out in faith we find we are floating in the midst of something bigger and more beautiful than we could have imagined.